


Wrong Floor

by adragonsshadow



Series: Critical College AU [2]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: also bigby does not appreciate this, neither does scanlan because it's Late but he's got a soft heart for asshole kids, scanlan's not magic but it's pretty close
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-25
Updated: 2017-03-25
Packaged: 2018-10-10 09:40:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 901
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10434894
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/adragonsshadow/pseuds/adragonsshadow
Summary: Vax just wanted to get to bed. But now he's getting lectured on breaking and entering and stealing and it's 2 am and could the images just stop.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Basically, Vax made a mistake getting into their apartment building and whoops now he's gotta deal with this man instead of his sister and he honestly doesn't know which would be worse at this point.

The urge to interrupt him before he had finished was overwhelming.

Vax had simply been trying to get up to his room and in a window without his sister noticing that he’d been out late. They had that party to go to with the Lord of Briarforest or whatever tomorrow night – well, _fuck_ , tonight if the ostentatious clock on the wall was correct.

He knew he shouldn’t have gone out, but money wasn’t exactly easy to come by – even with their scholarships – and if he could help them out by doing a few jobs it really wasn’t any of her business.

But he could deal with that later, right now he had to deal with this. Whatever _this_ was.

In reality, _this_ was simply a short, slight man – who was definitely not Vex – lecturing Vax on something he probably should’ve been paying attention to.

And, as the man strode around his couch to better appraise the willowy man who picked his lock and climbed in through his window, Vax saw that he was without a single scrap of clothing on his body. Vax had seen his fair share of bodies and this man was fairly well-endowed for such a small figure, but it didn’t change the fact that this was not his apartment and it was nearing 2 in the morning and this naked man was still talking.

“…and I cannot believe that you would dare rob me, the famous Bert Reynolds, without begging for forgiveness and mercy when I catch you in the act. Did you really thing that you could get in without being seen? I have invisible servants everywhere boy! They know the second that anyone enters my abode, touches anything, or even looks in the direction of my stuff. And robbing me?! What an abhorrent idea and a fanciful one for a backwater country bumpkin, the real crimes done in this century are online don’t you know? You can make one pretty penny after another with music and some overpriced merchandise these days–”

“Okay I’m gonna stop you right there and request that you put on something if you plan on lecturing me until dawn shorty,” Vax interrupted when it became apparent that this little man was losing no steam with his speech. “And if you aren’t going to call the police,” Vax prayed he wouldn’t with all his heart, “you can just show me the door and I’ll be out of your…hair.”

The short man – what was his name Brian Raymond? – squinted up at Vax’s shadowed face looking for something that he found a second later. A broad grin spread across the smaller man’s face as he extended his hand for Vax to shake. “I’m Scanlan Shorthalt, musician and lover extraordinaire,” he said with a wink that Vax often saw his sister offer to bartenders and waiters for a bit of _special_ service with their excursions.

Hesitantly, Vax shook the man’s hand. “I’m Vax,” was all he was willing to offer to this strange man who was still naked at 2 in the morning talking with a stranger who climbed in through his window.

“Well Vax,” Scanlan said, looking at him appraisingly, “the door is right over here.” And he turned around, giving Vax a perfect view of an ass he did not want to see right now, striding over to a door that seemed to appear out of nowhere. Vax obediently followed at a sedate pace and brushed past Scanlan to the hallway before heading over to the stairs and preparing his statement for when his sister would, inevitably, interrogate him on where he had been for the past few hours.

Someone cleared their throat behind him, and as Vax whirled around he saw the still naked form of Scanlan Shorthalt leaning up against the doorframe, arms crossed, bathed in the harsh fluorescent lighting of the hallway. He wore an unimpressed look which Vax guessed was directed at his sudden departure.

They stood in silence for a moment before Vax called out a hesitant, slightly questioning, “Goodnight,” before he turned back to continue the dreaded journey up to see his sister.

Scanlan simply shook his head silently and slipped back into his apartment, the door somehow fading out of view of the hallway after he shut it tightly.

As he made his way upstairs, Vax let a small smile play around his lips as he turned the trinket he swiped from the table next to the window he climbed through in his hand. The statue was that of a hand, carved out of a purple stone, polished until it was gleaming, and dusted in a pink shimmering powder that made the fingers appear to sparkle with a playful light.

Then he pocketed his prize, took a deep breath, and, finally, snuck into his own apartment to find his sister and her bear of a pet nowhere to be found. Further investigation revealed that her door was closed and they were snoring enough to wake the dead, so he was home free.

Vax gracefully stumbled into his room, messily shoving off clothes and weapons and stolen goods alike onto tables and chairs and the floor. With clumsy, loving care he set down his stolen trophy on a shelf before he letting sleep take him. And in his dreams he could’ve sworn that the hand he stole flipped him off before he finally closed his eyes.

**Author's Note:**

> So I actually rolled for the slight of hand with stealing the bigby's hand equivalent and then for Scanman's perception and goddamn Liam is awesome because I rolled a nat 20 for bird dad.  
> I don't really know if I like how this turned out, a bit abrupt in some places, but I adore the platonic relationship Scanlan had with most of the crew and this is how it starts for this college AU.  
> And here are the prompts that inspired this piece:  
> “I’m going to need you to put on some underwear before you say anything else.“   
> "You found me hanging by my fingertips from your window and i don’t want to tell you i was trying to rob you but idk how else to explain this and i don’t want to go to jail”  
> Anyways.  
> <3


End file.
